This is Mom's Page
Ruth Pearl Rickard Capaccio died after a long illness Sunday January
27th 2008 at 1:05 PM. Get your pans out and made a dish of bread
pudding and remember the wonderful days we had.
Ruth Pearl Capaccio, was born in
Northfield NY the daughter of Katherine and Amasa Rickard in 1916.
She grew up on the farm with her two sisters and two brothers. After
graduating from Walton Central School, she attended Oneonta Normal
School. Her teaching career began in a one room school near Walton
where she had to go in early to start the fire and cook lunch for her
students. Her stories of these Depression years about students without
enough to eat showed the compassion and purpose with which she led her
life. Ruth’s future husband, Vincent Capaccio, worked with Ruth’s
sister-in-law Vera in a barber and beauty shop; he met Ruth when he
brought Vera to visit her in the hospital while she was in a coma
following a terrible car accident. Ruth married Vincent on January 11,
1942 the day so cold that our family remembers as “the day the wine
froze”. Ruth returned to the farm while, Vincent served in England
during WWII, and tended her young children. After the war they
settled in Sidney where she continued to nurture her five children
while her husband attended college under the GI Bill. When her
children were older Ruth returned to teaching at Sidney Central
School. She attended SUNY Oneonta at night to become permanently
certified as a teacher. After many rewarding years she retired and
enjoyed life as a Snow Bird with her husband migrating annually to
Rotonda, Florida. She and Vincent also enjoyed many European trips.
Home in Sidney over the summers, she presided over Sunday dinners with
the family, always topped off by her famous bread pudding, and spent
weeks with her grandchildren that they will always treasure. With
advancing age, Ruth, always a great reader and crossword puzzle
solver, suffered keenly from the loss of her eyesight due to the
ravages of macular degeneration. She and Vincent lived with their
daughter Alicia for several years and then the NYS Veterans Home in
Oxford. Vincent passed away in 2002, and Ruth has now joined him.
She is survived by her five children and their spouses:
Mary Ann & Michael Prucnal of Pasadena MD, Vincent and Cynthia
Capaccio of Raphine VA, Anthony and Helen Capaccio or Norwich, Alicia
and Thomas Pritchard of Albany, and Theresa and Robert Petrocelli of
Pasadena, MD. She has ten grandchildren, and eight great grand
children. She is also survived by her brother Arthur Richard of
Florida
Her family and all those who were touched by Ruth will
always remember her as a loving mother and faithful spouse, with a
wise, gentle and generous spirit.
Memorial contributions may be made in her name to:
National Eye Institute
Building 31, Room 6A16
31 Center Drive MSC 2510
Bethesda, MD 20892-2510
Please enclose a letter with your memorial indicating
that the donation is to be used for research at the NEI for Macular
Degeneration.
A memorial mass will be celebrated by Father
Douglas Cunningham at St Paul’s Church in Norwich New York on
Funeral services and committal will be held at a
later date.
Moms
family circa 1950's possibility taken on the family farm in Northfield,
New York. She is holding the youngest child Theresa. Dad,
Vincent (Jim) is holding Alicia, front row Anthony (Tony) Mary Ann and
Vincent
A
family get together at 272 Johnston Circle. Does anyone remember the
occasion or date?. Front row Alicia, Mom, Dad, Tony. Rear Mary Anne
Theresa, Vince.
Remembrances: Send them to me and I will get them on the web
It has been a long, personally difficult, time for me watching our
mother die cell by cell over the past several years since Dad died, that
is also when Mom really stopped living, and I am thankful that it is
nearly over for her now. It is now time for us to celebrate our family and
realize how lucky and blessed we have been. I recently received a pamphlet
entitled "Living Successfully", and it outlined things to do during
different periods of your life. The first thing it said under the heading
"Prenatal" was "choose your parents carefully" I believe we did.
Tony
So what do you remember about 265 Johnston Circle? Mom was .mom, dad,
boss, director, physician, father confessor, bookkeeper, and everything
else!
These were the days when dad was in Albany going to collage!
I remember the day Mary Ann taught me to ride a bicycle. She had a
single speed bike that Aunt Tille had bought her ( I think Tillie bought
each of us a bike when we were of appropriate age)., So one day,
probably to shut me up I was allowed to ride the bike. It all started
innocently. I was standing on the pedals and steering around the yard
and Mary Anne was pushing. She got me lined up headed toward the school
and said hold on, and proceed to push me over the hill! Down the hill
across the road I went, I could hear.! USE THE BREAK !...don't remember
that lesson. ! The bike and I ended in some slow motion crash no great
injuries to either of us. Over the nest few days I learned to steer,
break and pedal! Always starting with a Kamikaze run down the hill!
I don't think mom knew my sister tried to kill me.
Vince
I did not--try to kill you, that is. I just taught you the way Dad
taught me--Get the bike going at speed, let go and hope for the best.
What are a few skinned knees among family?
Mary Ann
I have photographic proof that I learned the same way at Vince's hands!
Don't you just love the rules.
Lisa
The time mom got mad.
Walk softly but carry a big stick. I never
understood how mom could maintain control without ever raising her
voice…
You probably don’t believe me right? Mom
was always soft spoken and kind; never one to even say a disheartening
word to anyone. That is how I always saw her. But you’ve heard people
say “I wouldn’t want to be on her wrong side”, and this day was that one
time I could say the same. Mom got mad.
We were visiting the folks one February
break in Florida back when they were renting and back when Vinny was in
high school. We had gone to the beach and while we were there, low and
behold, Vinny took off to walk by the water and some time later he
returned with two girls. What? Vinny was shy then and hadn’t been one to
go out and pick up girls yet. It turned out that he had met two girls
from school walking on the beach with there grandparents too! Wow, it’s
a small world, and they agreed to meet here the next day to swim at the
pool. As mom and dad were renters then, they made sure to purchase extra
‘guest’ tags for company so everyone was legal, so to speak at the pool,
each tag costing $5.00 from the office. When Sherrie arrived in her
grandparent’s car which had Florida tags, someone noticed and assumed
the worst; that a local was here to use our private pool. A sin you
don’t want to get caught committing around here. So even though the kids
had their tags pinned to their suits, someone came immediately to kick
them out of the pool area. Vinny said, we’re visiting my grandparents in
the Savannah building and here are our tags, I’m Vince Capaccio’s grand
son. That didn’t matter. The Florida tag on the car parked out front was
proof enough that some wrong doing was being done.
Once the kids got back to tell why they had not been
able to swim, mom decided this was just wrong. She had followed all the
rules. Everyone knew them and knew we were coming for a visit, as it was
even mentioned in the Riverhouse newsletter. (See, you can’t get away with
anything in a small condo community such as this).
Mom’s face got red; she began to pace from window to
window. Then she asked dad to get her a glass of wine, drank it down and
then poured herself another one and dialed the number of the chairman of
the board for Riverhouse and then the manager’s office. Words came out of
her I’d never heard before. “The kids had their damn tags that I bought
for them, they told you who they were, how many Capaccio’s do you know
around here, anyhow? $@%&@*!!!” She was upset and she let the appropriate
people know it!!! The kids were too upset to try the pool again that day!
The following personal apology from the chairman didn’t seem to make much
of a difference to her. YIKES
P.S she never paid $5 for pool passes
again
Cindy
When I think about Grandma, I think about family.
When I was young I remember going to visit my
grandparents in Sidney. This was an early memory, Lisa and Theresa still
lived at home, I remember sitting in the “family” room watching a baseball
game at night, the more I think of it, I saw nothing other than baseball
on that TV. A snowy shadow of a baseball game that was High-Tech of the
day! And when I say “family” room, that’s what it was. I room full of
family. My dad sitting on the radiator, Tony on the floor with me, my
mother on a chair from the kitchen table, etc. etc., it was a room full of
family. The only folks that got good seats were Grandma, and Grandpa, the
rest of us sat on the floor, on pillows, or folding chairs. It was nice
to visit Great Grandma Rickard in her room, she always had hard candy in a
jar. Family night continued playing board games, listening to music on
the “Hi-Fi”, and I have seen no better Christmas tree than in their
house.
When I got older, bread pudding may have fallen
out of style, because I always remember grandma making banana splits for
me, and when I was old enough to drive, Grandpa would send me downtown to
get a pizza after dinner! What a treat!
Whenever we visited, there was a “discussion” about
something. Dad and Tony and Grandpa were always voicing their difference
of opinions. But it was still in the family room and good or bad it was
issues that pertained to our family.
When I visited Grandpa in 2002, I told grandpa that
Lynda and I were pregnant, and we had found out it was a boy. No one else
knew that yet, but I wanted him to know that his family name would live
on, because that’s what it’s all about, family. Grandma said, “Whatever
you do, don’t name him Vincent! Too much confusion.” I didn’t tell her
then, but she found out that we did name our son Vincent Valor when she
met him a year later.
Grandma never got to meet Honor, but she knows her now.
And I will make sure I tell Honor and Val all the wonderful stories about
their family.
PS Grandma also told me not to name you Vincent, too
much confusion. Was she ever wrong?
V. David Capaccio
Going to
the Farm. It was an every Sunday ritual. I remember as I got older
sometimes I tried to get out of going because Grandpa was sick and we
couldn’t go out and do much and it was JUST BORING. One time I was
particularly insistent on not going and Mom was insistent that we all
go. She said very quietly but firmly, “my father is sick and I don’t
know how many more times I am going to be able to visit him”. That was
the end of the discussion and we went to the farm. Once we got there at
least Grandma always had sugar cookies or molasses cookies or fresh
cinnamon buns, so it was worth the trip. I remember picking wild
strawberries and how good they were fresh and also how good the canned
ones were in the winter especially with homemade ice cream.
The trip to the farm (14 miles) seemed to take
forever bouncing along the road, Mom sawing at the wheel in the old
Plymouth to keep it going straight. They sure don’t make them like they
used too.
I was always jealous of Vince because he got to go and
help on the farm doing haying and milking and other things, He got the
drive the tractor home for lunch. I was fascinated with those tractors.
I loved the sound they made. That is why I now have Uncle Arlyn’s
tractor, it sits in my yard all summer long and I just start it and
listen to is run and move it so I can mow the lawn.
Grandpa’s garage was also a very exciting place. I
loved all of his old license plates. Vince and I got a lot of them and
divided them up and we both still collect any license plates that we can
get our hands on. The other thing about the garage was the old drill
press; I would go out there and just turn it for hours.
I went fishing with grandpa once in the pond behind the
barn for bullheads. I wouldn’t put the worm on the hook. I sat there
with my pole with the bugs buzzing around me and finally caught one. I
was very excited and when I grabbed it to show it to grandpa I learned
about the spike in their head; that was the last time I ever went
fishing. I love to eat fish bud I do not like Catfish!
I was overseas in the Army when grandma’s stuff was
auctioned so I didn’t end up with much, but the piano eventually ended up
at my house and Antoinette still plays it a little when she is home. The
tractor is out on the lawn to listen too. I have a bunch of old tools farm
Art’s barn when he finally left the farm. I have milk cans and
scythes and lots of rusty hand tools that I just couldn’t leave there, if
anyone wants any of them for a keepsake, I’m sure I have enough to share.
It’s something to remember where we came from and see how far we’ve gone.
Tony
Vince, you taught me to ride a bike that
way too. The advantage I had was that I didn't have to go across a
road because I started from 272 and I didn't have a school to run into
at the end because it was gone by then. We had an old bike with a
stand that held the back wheel off the ground. You talked me into
sitting on the bike and peddling as fast as I could and then you gave
me a push, I was at the bottom of the hill before I know what
happened. It was easy riding after that. Pushing the bike up the hill
wasn't easy. I got my bike from Uncle Tony on my birthday, It was a
3 speed English bike with hand brakes. I remember when I managed to
wreck your bike at the corner of Bird Ave and Pearl St, I was going
way too fast and didn't know how to avoid all of the cars that were in
the way so I tried to go around them and ended up crashing head on
into a concrete fence post. I bent the forks and you were really mad
for some reason (we turned the forks around backward
so we could steer and that bike lived on for years...Vince). On an unrelated bike riding note, one day when Dom
was about 5 and we lived in Mount Upton he was bothering me and I told
him to go out and ride his sisters bike, I figured it would keep him
out of my hair for a little while because I knew he would be totally
unable to ride it and it would keep him occupied. A few seconds later
I looked out the window and saw him going down the driveway heading
for the road riding the bike not totally in control but he saved
himself before he got to the road.
Tony